Ginger Alert! Now that the hangover has faded, it has become clear that the staff at Ginger 62 not only added a healthy tip without authorization to my bill, and subsequently ran through my card without my signature, and then, took my card and filled their car with gas at 3 in the morning. Thanks Ginger!

Marked in my daytimer for last Friday was a reminder to "rejoice in my success". What success you may ask? Well, if I have not explained before on these pages, I am in sales, in sofware sales, for a large company, whose performance is graded quarterly. Most of the business comes in during the last week of the quarter, with much of it on the last day.

So rejoice we did, perhaps too emphatically, as I am not used to drinking so heavily. I must have had 5 drinks before I even left the office. Then it was off the a pub with my coworkers to drink on the company tab. We left to have a smoke and perhaps watch a little "ballet", but we slipped into Ginger 62 for a drink. It turned out to be a mistake, as i lost my credit card there, and the bouncer wanted to take out Mike as we lobbied to go back inside to get the card. That will be my last time there. No regrets here.

And now for you, here is Dry Shave. Go buy the book, NOW.

Oh my christ, is television pathetic. I have tried, really tried to watch tv for the last few nights, but am never able to make it through more than a few minutes at a time. The programming during the evenings seems to break down into the following categories: sports, "news", infotainment, celebrity-based news, game shows, and of course, "Friends". Is this what you get for your $50 a month cable subscription?

I have been wasting much time at work playing gameneverending. Get on it and test it, but have patience as it is still a prototype, or God will smote your ass!

Dean of Textism writes today, or last night, about how much he hated being inconvenienced by film sets in Vancouver, producing the next episode of Hostage Negotiator, or Halloween 8. While I am concerned for his misanthropy, many of his points are valid. I detest the industry with more venom than he, as it holds my wife captive for 16 hours a day, leaving me a bachelor 5 nights of the week. Which is why I tried watching tv. I used to just smoke pot every night and fall asleep, but that left me too hazy in the morning to deal with the uppity midwesterners calling me on the phone to bitch about my price increases. Fuck them all if they can't understand why i am so drowsy. For christ's sake, it 630am in Vancouver, what do expect, complete concenration?

My ex-girlfriend got married last weekend. I was not invited, which was great, because I would not have attended, seeing as how I am married anyway. Strange how you can be with someone for 5 years and not even care in the slightest for them. Man, she was country.

I will upgrade this damn thing to blogger plus, or blogger de-luxe, sometime soon, as soon as I cancel my porn subscriptions.

Hello, I'm today's guest editor of Schoolboy77. Andrew's fingers are badly sprained as he is suffering from an acute case of carpal tunnel syndrome. It’s a warning to us all: if you don't use your whole arm muscles the nerves-and-tendon passage in the wrist can become inflamed. Actually that's a lie, I’m a 13-year-old computer hacker from Cape Breton and have decided to wreck havoc in the Blog community. Be warned: the CIA wants me to work for them.

I have this quote that my history teacher keeps taped to the front of his classroom (he's got a ponytail):

We are only geometricians in regard to matter; the Greeks were first of all geometricians in the apprenticeship of virtue. Since force corrupts even the righteous . . . the only worthwhile strategy for the true radical is the interruption of force wherever it appears.
-Simone Weil

What genius of political analysis recently said this: “The root causes of terrorism are terrorists.” Hint: he's the same Canadian Prime Minister who bares an outlandish chin and pooh-poohed the idea that free trade (question: more or less cool than the BareNakedLadies?) would limit Canada's room for manoeuvre. I cannot decide if this is solipsism or a tautology. But I'm only 13. Vexing, it keeps me up at night.

That said I'm not worried for Canada, because ‘the Americans’ will undoubtedly let us keep our bureaucracy. Not even US military might could defeat something that entrenched and obstinate. Saddam could use a platoon of clerks from any number of Canadian ministries; once they're dug in they never give up.

I used to think that Canada was the “North American Alternative” but now it seems we're more “the convenient Northern fiction”. That's it got to get to class.

See if you can guess who I am:

I have at one time been supported, or am presently supported by the US military.

I have bought many weapons from the US.

I have used these weapons against minorities that annoy me and get in the way of my agenda.

I have used these weapons against other countries.

Who am I?

If you answered Ariel Sharon, Benjamin Netanyahu, General Musharraf Parvez or Saddam Hussein, you are correct.

No matter how much I try, I can't let go of my love the Grateful Dead. Rob came by my workstation ( i can't believe i just wrote that), pinned a picture of the band from the Donna Jean and Keith period, and walked away without a word.

Things are getting pushed to the edge in the arena of world affairs. GWB is on the brink of starting a major perpetual war (the US having already started and funded several smaller perpetual wars), and no Americans seem to voice their disapproval. I say this not to call Americans apathetic. I think they care much more deeply than the press reports, and that is exactly the problem. The American media is not actively asking for justification for this war. This is being left to a handful of politicians and to the general public, who are largely excluded from influencing the opinions expressed through the major news media. Rise up and shout!

I love Canada.

I could not have said it better. It is time for Americans to wake up and blow off the mind dust from a lifetime of mind-numbing consumption.

What earthly good can this possibly serve?

Ahhhh, still recovering from Island Style 3, my first real outdoor party in several years, and my first time going off since I saw Ritchie Hawtin at Sona last September. I was quite anxious upon arrival, as Anya and I were stumbling around in the dark gaggle of youths, looking for west coast funky house....we found it.

My favorite moment of the night was when the DJ mixed in Nancy Sinatra's "These Boots Were Made for Walking". Everybody loved it, even the kids. Speaking of kids, a 23-year old came up to me and asked me how old I was. When I said "31", he said "cool, I would love to see my parents at this type of thing".

Too much work and too much worry make for a boring life. I refuse to sit around and talk about mortgage payments and investments, like people from southern Ontario. Well- they're not all like that, in fact only a few are, but I seem to know too many of them.

Boredom has spread through my office like a virus. The so-called War on Terror continues unabated and seemlingly unopposed. I am just glad Canada brought the troops home. I have been hesitant to post comments of a political nature here, but I can no longer ignore the political animal raging and seething underneath my button down existence.

Nepotism
n.
Favoritism shown or patronage granted to relatives, as in business.

Two years ago today I made the best decision in my life and married Anya. I love her more than ever.

According to my research, the second anniversary calls for a gift of cotton. This severely limits the gift selection to clothing. I bought her a Fred Perry t-shirt from the Pharsyde It's a tight light blue top. I think she will love it.


On another topic, my 4 year old nephew is now speaking like a 10 year old. Says he, " you would be impressed with the serious tennis we're playing."

I look to the south and pray it won't happen here, that we won't become what they have become. I don't think we have that in us, but i do worry seriously that the American tradition of extraterritoriality will continue with brutal measures against Canadian social values.

For the first time in a long time, i worry for the state of the world.

As I toiled in the sweltering heat of the summer of 1994, in various hellholes scattered across northern BC, I dreamed of escape. Escape from the gruelling phyical labor of treeplanting, the monotony and uselessness of replanting clearcuts that were only going to be logged again in 60 years if the trees actually survived, and the spirit crushing reality that we were so very far away from anything.

I sang in my head to rid myself of the pain of this reality. Reggae, the music of 400 hundred years of suffering, offered little other than eventual but distant salvation, and the occasional dose of revenge. What I love to sing was Steely Dan, and while looking through my CDs tonight, I saw a track I had to play, if only to make me feel grateful that I am not out there with the cold, heat, bugs, bears, stinging nettle, devils club, and rednecks.

This is what I would sing:

Bad sneakers and a pina colada my friend

stomping on the avenue by radio city with a

transistor and a large sum of money to spend

Perhaps you are wondering if I managed to beat coffee.

I did not.

How much time are you wasting?

I have noticed recently that events that unrelated to work that occupies people's time during regular working hours are now being measured for their negative impact on productivity. I first noticed this with Star Wars, but have seen it measured again due to England's positive showing in World Cup 2002. Some predictions are drastic, but never fear, for any problem, whether real or percieved, there is a consultant waiting to bill you.

If David Frum had his way, every sporting event will have its productivity cost worked into its project justification. I can't wait.

Today is my first day without coffee. I will make it. I will win.
Why am I quitting? Oh, the headaches, sleeplessness, and not to mention the ulcer-like feeling in my stomach.

This only reminds me why I don't live in the US. Has anyone heard Ashcroft sing? Do you Americans out there not realize this only encourages other nations to despise the American government even more intensely?

From Gary Shteyngart in this week's New York Times magazine.

"The past 100 years have been just horrific for Russians. They're history's losers. Their country has become a third-world cesspool. Yet the Russian people survive somehow. I'm not excusing criminality, especially the violence., but I do try to understand it."

If you have not already done so, GET YOUR WAR ON!

I hate writing proposals. The client only reads the last page anyway. They just want to know how much, not why we are buying this. I just spent 4 hours writing some crap on what a CPU license is, and how 5x12 tech support differs from 7X24 support. Can you figure out that one?

This pays my way but it corrodes my soul.....